Man Thoughts: Real Class has nothing to do with Thine Breast and Thine Ass

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Class has nothing to do with thine Breast and thine Ass
Demand something more of yourself from the depths of your soul
Something valuable that outlasts your lumps and your bumps
Something deeper that goes past the depths of your peaks
Its somewhere in there, hidden beneath your hair
Its somewhere in there, hidden beneath the filters on the photos you share

I wish I could see more of you and not your mutiple views of your figure
I know you think your looks attract me
But sometimes if not most times your looks attack me.
I cannot even appreciate the goodness in you
When I only see that dress is barely even on you.

You would rather get skint trying to show me your skin
You would rather be fair skinned than be fair to your skin.
If my love as a man is not for sale
Why is yours forever on discount even when there is no sale.
I wish you would value YOU more than I do
Because if you did I would learn to love the woman
more as a woman
And not an Idol.
Your eyes look like a dolls and it seems
Your only prize is your hair and your clothes

In all honesty where do I fit in?
If you are only obsessed with being a sex kitten.
My dreams, ambitions cannot fit between your legs
I need them to enter into and be repeated through the holes
In and around your head.

Just remember as you walk around your own ego
Class has nothing to do with thine breast and thine ass

©Martin Vito 2014
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Leadership Notes: Reflection And New Thinking

I sincerely hope that my thoughts find you strong and well. As we wrap up 2013 I just want to thank everyone who was a part of my personal developmental process. Admittedly it is not easy to just share ones thoughts especially when they go against the grain of people you may still be talking to and engaging with on a regular basis. Anyway I share because I care, it is what it is.

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Over time I have come to find that if you have a voice, you should speak and in doing so be prepared to accept whatever comes with that voice being heard and that includes the perks and the set backs. In 2013 I encountered so many interesting people who have some great views as well as some with not so great views in relation to mine. I learnt something from all of them and I sincerely hope that they have learnt something from me.

Ironically when we think of our personal development and its implications we rarely look at its impact on others. People who are self focused assume that personal development is all about “Me, Myself, And I” but really the best benefits are usually received by the people right next to you. A better me means that I give better advice to those in need of it, a better me means I see less of myself and more of the amazingness of the people around me. A better me means I trust people with the things that I discern they can handle rather than just what they say with their mouths.

In reflection there is very little I would do differently in 2013. I have made mistakes most especially mistakes unique to my Purpose and my desire to help others.

2014 is that time to improve as I realise what needs to be changed rather than waiting for time to go by before I look closer.

3 Things To do differently In 2014…

1) Stop assuming that just because someone has nodded their head in agreement to something you said it means that they are on the same boat as you concerning all other thoughts around the subject. Its likely that truth is as fleeting as a phone call or whatsapp broadcast. (They never take it seriously unless theres something tangeble in it for them)
“The truth looks good in the time of seeking but its very difficult to maintain in the time of testing”
When you share with someone something that you have discovered to be true over time and they seem on your side but when they are tested on that conviction they crumble and give all the excuses as to why its not such a big deal then perhaps you were never really in agreement. Please get it now. In the absence of agreement even the truth we agreed on can and will become our biggest source of dispute.

2) Leaving important decisions to indecisive people.
In dealing with people you will notice traits that destroy that persons well being as well as yours. When you forsake your convictions because someone is yet to decide which side they are on through their conduct, you subconsciously slow yourself down from progressive development.
You become an accessory to their indecisions.

“Indecision is an enemy to who you are going to be if you already know what you are doing.” Martin Vito

3) Put your hands up when you have tried your best to help and it has been rejected. I am in no way encouraging you to give up on “People” but I am encouraging you to give up on the messy situations in your life that pertain to someone else’s shortcomings most especially when they are not willing work with you. I believe in investing in people but I do not believe in allowing your time to be consumed by wild goose chases.

a) Its a wild goose chase when your contributions are taken with negligence.
b) Its a wild goose chase when your words and actions match up but they still dont believe you have integrity.
c) Its a wild goose chase when you Love them but they dont expect some heat for inconsistency.

Helping a friend is a good thing, but helping a friend and foresaking destiny well thats just dumb. So forgive me if it idoesnt seem like Im interested in chasing someone trying to hide.

That being said Im very much looking forward to speaking at length with those who want to be helped beyond the consmetic level of transformation. Matters of the heart are not taken lightly when they affect your destiny.

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So much more good to come for those who seek answers without reservation.

All things said with Love and Respect
For Learning Engagements, Problems and Personal Development Inquiries
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mrvitouk@gmail.com
@MrVitoSpeaks

Friendship Short Notes :- Friend or Foe?

“Frenemy” (alternately spelled “frienemy”) is a portmanteau of “friend” and “enemy” that can refer to either an enemy pretending to be a friend or someone who really is a friend but is also a rival. The term is used to describe personal, geopolitical, and commercial relationships both among individuals and groups or institutions. The word has appeared in print as early as 1953.

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You are reaching that stage in your life where you need to take giant leaps of faith towards what you know to be the next level. Check your company. Some folks shouldn’t be on board your vehicle. They are too busy behaving like anchors at the times you need to set sail and sails when you need to be anchored. You have to be brave enough to step away, break away from friends who are not bringing out the best in you. You must also then be brave enough to stick with those who are fighting for your progress and promotion. Good friendships are not the result of natural selection they are the result of well informed choice. When you defend and fend for Frienemies you inevitably develop a bad taste for good friends. Unfortunately the road to destruction is paved with Frienemy intentions. You also have to quit trying to forge genuine relationships with ingenuine people. Don’t be the reason why your integrity is sold down the river because you were trying to impress a fake smiler when you could have stood better with a genuine person. Sometimes Frienemies get things quicker than Friends and the temptation to stray down the path of discovery with the “know it all” frienemy rather than the “Im discovering with you friend” is strong but if you want to maintain your integrity be sure to check the intentions of your company. Remember your true success is not really about you but what you choose to entertain you.

All things said with Love and Respect
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Relationship Short Notes :- Your Eyes

Are you the kind of person who just goes for whatever and whoever you want? Are you the person who regardless of the circumstances will approach a man/woman or plot to have a man/woman without restraint? If all this while you have made moves like this and it has ended up in your unhappiness. It may be time to change your heart on certain things. Too many people think that manipulating circumstances and people most especially the opposite sex is something that has no consequence. Don’t let this assumption make you careless. Your Lusts can and will lead you to someone worse off in heart than you think….

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All things said with Love and Respect
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Fathers/Mothers Family

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You know there’s a saying that goes
“Train Up a child in the way he/she should go and when he goes up he will not depart from it”

This meaning when a child is given adequate attention in his formative years and is instructed and taught in a balanced manner by both his father and his mother, the child’s character, aspiration, confidence and motivations will be balanced. The child’s ways of thinking will be sober and wise, he/she will seek the greater good of others whilst simultaneously maintaining a sense of purpose and direction. The Father gives the sperm and the Mother provides and egg and thus a consistent mutual combination of the two is required to maintain the child’s internal balance. The more we separate these concepts and allow the circumstances of nature to dictate the family breakdown the worse our perception of family will be. Granted a child may gravitate towards one parent more than the other based on likes and disciplinary actions taken but Love and Respect must be received from both parents.
In our generations today there is a growing epidemic that has been slowly destroying our children and their ability to understand the world from the right position.

You see in the absence of one parent there are bound to be things that the other parent will not be able to contribute accurately to the child’s life. This in no way negates the lone parents contribution but it creates a ticking time bomb of social dysfunction in the child unless someone intervenes. We all deserve to have both parents contribute their essence into our lives beyond the genetics. We need to be filled with truth and a strong sense of self and healthy practice for growth and development.

Some of you may or may not know this..but

“A million UK children are growing up without a father in their lives, says a new report on family breakdown.
The Centre for Social Justice report says lone parent families are increasing by more than 20,000 a year, and will top two million by the next general election.”

Unfortunately those who know this fact are only able to do so much but the problem of absent men is a growing one. Men are now more known to do the runner after impregnating the woman they liked in a moment of lust, broken relationship, poor self management, depression, poverty, unhappiness. This is likely because they witnessed an imbalance in their own upbringing somewhere. All men are born with the capacity to be naughty but its likely there were either learnt behaviours or absence of a parent or parents in the home that sped up the problem. A child is born with the capacity to look up at his/her father or mother for the truth about life. When a parent is absent something else or someone else will step in to influence the child to be a certain way. For most it’s usually ENVIRONMENT that becomes the father/mother, PEERS, MUSIC, ENTERTAINMENT, or SELF. Unfortunately all of this in the wrong doses create a very selfish individual with no other care but to satisfy selfish undisciplined desires.

“The absence of fathers is linked to higher rates of teenage crime, pregnancy and disadvantage, the report says, warning that the UK is experiencing a “tsunami” of family breakdown.”

The truth is that although society may cause us to always separate the contributions of fathers and mothers from our lives we should remain conscious that both are required to create a balanced diet of truth, purpose, growth, relationships and legacy. We should now hope and plan that when it is our turn to be in the teacher and the instructors seat we will not create an imbalance in our future generations through absence and neglect.

“CSJ director Christian Guy says: “For children growing up in some of the poorest parts of the country, men are rarely encountered in the home or in the classroom. This is an ignored form of deprivation that can have profoundly damaging consequences on social and mental development.”

That being said today may be the day you ask your father the deeper questions about his own life. You may learn something deeper about the way you are and why you are. If you are not able to do this for a reason beyond your control then ask those who know him and whom you can trust.
These perspectives may teach you the necessary things to look our for in your own attempts to be the best you can be.

All things said with Love and Respect
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Love & Purpose: Men and Their Leagues

Theres different leagues of men. Each League has a different attitude towards love and purpose.

Premier League
Division One
Division Two
Division Three

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1) In the Premier League This mans knowledge of his Purpose creates and maintains a place where Love can exist. The man in this league wants a woman to take the journey with him not just spend the night. The rules and self discipline for him are different. Sex is not until marriage. Now although some men Live in this league others pop in and out as an when their feelings take over. It is this inconsistency that causes good women to relegate him..
Rules for relegation include
A) Unfaithful.
B) Poor Emotions Management.
C) Refusing to Address the important things crucial to maintenance.
D) Poor Self Outlook
E) Love that Promises to but never KEEPS you secure(No Matter what You Try)

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2) Division 1
This kind of man will get with a partner, have sex, claim to fall in love, accidentally gets committed to the relationship. He reluctantly follows the natural path of a relationship but he is not interested in marriage with you for one reason or the other, He would accept buying a house with you and living together for about 10-15years then get married after the 3rd Child. The relationship is filled with break ups and make ups. Possibly children with other women and affairs.
His children are likely to follow the same example as they did not see marriage but a slightly volatile version of togetherness.

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3)Division 2
Is strictly for “Causal Relationships” and “casual dating”
Sex is the norm and this man is part of a network of people that dont know what love is only see sex first and details later. For this kind of man if sex is not provided then he will look elsewhere.. But if they liked how they were getting it from the women, then they may be back for more.. But this kind of man is only in it because of what he can get not because of Love and Dedication. This kind of man leaves the woman lacking a relationship. The woman involved falls in what she thinks is love but this man will not be there to catch her heart because he is only thrilled by the chase and hates the status.

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4)Division 3
In this league its okay to kiss whoever, whenever, that kind of Jeremy Kyle lifestyle “Don’t know if that’s My Son”. A relationship with man is not permitted but girls still do it anyway. He does what he pleases when he pleases.. He has no other aspiration but to test drive every woman he can before he comes to his senses. Hes down for the nights but hes never there in the morning. Is in a different bed every week and sees him self as a man slut by profession. Dresses well because his life is empty without a sexual prize..

Every woman now has choice as to which man they will allow in. Your consciousness of league determines what you allow in. You decide on where your life will end up and with whom. Women who get swept up by any man in any league are likely to be swapped between leagues and never find true happiness with one partner. Until they manage to catch the “MATCH OF THE DAY” unfortunately this is the kind of woman who wants her version of a good man trapped in a bad boys image. Everything is an experiment with this woman.

The truth is you never have to sell yourself to the man who deserves you. When he approaches he will be and remain what he needs to be to bring the peace required to down the aisle and stay in the aisle with you for Life.

All things said with Love and Respect
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Wisdom for Men 2

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The thing a man is supposed to primarily do is Love, the truth is most of us men then use this quality towards, things like “Money”, “Cars” , “Girls”, and then if our mind will entertain the thought of Loving a wife and loving our children we entertain it. Some of start out well and determined but we end up sleeping on the responsibility of Love because of how “Money”, “Cars”, and “Girls” make us feel. Our emotions are lost in our child like foolishness, our trust is lost in multiple casual relations with girls, our friendships can’t stand the inconsistency and then the man leaves his body in one place and has his mind in another and his emotions in another.

What will happen to the generation that already believes that we need all these things to be happy?..

My only suggestion is that if you are a sober man with substance, just take the time to share a thought or two inspired by this with another man that will listen. Don’t you think it’s time men kind of took a hold of themselves and all these destructive habits and put them away?

We need more men just standing up to themselves and disowning weak minded pursuits that are fruitless and unrewarding…

All things said with Love and Respect
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3 Things Influential People Can Do To Improve Personal Relationships

3 Things Influential People Can Do To Improve their Personal Relationships

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1) Discuss “Commitment” with your partner openly.
The purpose of these discussions is really to remove ambiguity and mystery around the reasons for which you are committing to each other. Influential people need love and commitment to help keep sanity and balance in a very demanding world.

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2) Go to conferences or Seminars together and where possible read together. If you’re looking to grow as a partnership, I advise attending meetings where mutual and joint learning can take place and a common knowledge base can be established. Learning never stops you have to commit to learning together it opens up the understanding and also builds a bond of shared experience that validates the relationship.

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3) Utilize your talents for the sake of your relationships. Maybe you’re very intuitive or knowledgeable or discerning. When your partner is walking into danger or into really great opportunities be the one to encourage, warn and support them. Don’t be a yes partner, always saying yes knowing that something is not quite right be a discerning partner someone who looks out for your partners best interests and tries to ensure they are not cheated.
See yourself as your partners keeper.

Always remember Influence and relationships go hand in hand. Neglecting one in favor of the other does not do you good but understanding that both are required to progress in life is important.

All things said with Love and Respect
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12 Things You Can Do To Improve Your LIFE

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12 Things You Can do To Change Your Life for the Better

Your life is your responsibility, I advise anyone who wants to be “Influential” to take these words with heart and prepare for personal change in order to live that Life of purpose.
I sincerely hope you can extract something good from here. This list of activities will challenge your self perception and also help you to discover how you can live a better life. No personal preparation for greatness should be rushed through, it’s a gradual ride to that spot of understanding. Learn as much as you can.

1) Seek to know & understand your purpose and count the cost required to build what you have dreamt of.

2) Don’t give your body to strangers, It’s simple but effective in building a stronger stable and sustainable character.

3) Analyse the effectiveness of your friendships based on their truthfulness not just how you “feel” about them.

4) Get a good education if you haven’t got one already, a smart woman/man is attractive and great company all around.

5) Never allow bitterness, envy, jealousy have their way with your most priceless qualities.

6) If you don’t understand something or someone, ask questions that will empower you to make well informed decisions.

7) Never be ashamed to admit how you feel but be wise as to whom you share those feelings with.

8) Stop looking down on yourself, work on your confidence and boldly declare, and #ExcecuteYourHustle

9) Everything you are will become better if you consider Gods truth on everything.

10) DECIDE to move on from the foolishness of the past and let God renew your mind.

11) At least be honest enough to assess your desires and gauge what is “Fantasy” as well as what is “Faith”.

12) Before you start anything, never be scared to “In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. (Proverbs 3:6 NKJV)”

All things said with Love and Respect
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