Relationship Short Notes :- Friends With Benefits

When people hear the word friendship it is safe to assume they are talking about this…

Affection, sympathy, empathy, honesty, altruism, mutual understanding and compassion, enjoyment of each other’s company, trust, and the ability to be oneself, express one’s feelings, and make mistakes without fear of judgment from the friend.

It’s amazing how many people will cross this boundary to seek their personal sexual satisfaction. A man/woman can will peruse sexual benefits without any form of commitment most especially when they have no sense of purpose or self control. Be mindful of who you call “friend”. If you have ever been in a “Friends With Benefits Situation” you will know that it doesn’t take long before one of you starts to feel feelings beyond the purpose of the friendship. If you are the commitment type then you know this is not the best situation for you, in fact it’s just not good for anyone really…

Sex is more powerful than your personal power to suppress or be in denial. It is a tool which when used by the immature, naive or controlling people can cause irreparable damage to what could have been a functional, healthy and mutually elevating friendship. You should know that once you cross the line of friendship and have a sexual encounter with someone you like just “hanging” around with you are no longer “Friends” you are sexual partners… And yes it’s true once you give up that part of yourself to them you’re either going to want walk into love or walk out of total friendship with that individual. If both parties are functioning of sexual excitement someone’s going to get hurt.

There is no middle ground after self compromise & mutual compromise. Some people have “Friends with Sexual Benefits” as their standard of friendship. Real Friendship ascribes a sense of purpose and mutual growth between individuals but sexual encounters serve as an unnecessary bridge to emotional confusion. #RealTalk in that situation there are ropes involved! You can’t be sleeping with someone you call friend unless you’re married to them (ITS JUST SMART). Immature friends who are interested in using and abusing you for sex will work so hard to please your body but by now should know that they take the Love of the innocent quite frequently. When will your “Self Harm” stop?

The man who befriends women for sexual favours is not a friend but can be labelled as a sexual predator…He grooms vulnerable women and even men into a false sense of security and openness with the view that he can further take advantage of whatever essence those men/women have. Some women feel a strong loss of self esteem when they encounter certain guys because the agenda is not mutually favoured. The woman who befriends men/women for sexual reasons is also a sexual predator.. She is the woman with the sweetest lips full of “Lust” subtle “Perversion” and when she sees your inner tears/fears she promises that sex will fix your bleeding and she makes you taste what will never fit in a Purpose filled friendship. These kind of men and women cannot function without a sexual fix. Their personal failure to admit this to you from the beginning is what should prevent you from giving in to their suggestions. If you are a man or a woman practicing this kind of behaviour either change or look for the woman/woman who will put up with that👹. For so long you have taken advantage of the vulnerable then you will continue to hear me advise them against “Loving” You. I speak passionately on their behalf and aye! Enough is enough. If all else fails try being a genuine friend and this kind of behaviour is less likely to happen.

When sex is involved without “Commitment”💍 that is a compromise any purposeful friendship cannot afford…No matter how much we may want to make things work for us in these foundation less & broken situations. It may be smart to break away from any friendship that promotes sexual ties without “Commitment”💍.

This advice will only work for you if you decide to do away with the with sexual benefits. Oh and by the way…

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All things said with Love and Respect
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3 thoughts on “Relationship Short Notes :- Friends With Benefits

  1. I like the verbage you use. Friends with benefits is an abusive relationship. It’s quite unhealthy. What’s funny is I feel this is my type of thinking (if that makes any sense) andnone of this ever occured to me until I just read it now. As smart as I like to think I am, I always believe “friends with benefits” couldn’t occur between immature people. But as I’m re-thinking about it, it really cannot occur healthily at all. Someone will get hurt. Because essentially you are attempting to blend two different type of relationships. Great read….I will continue to give this some more thought.

    • Thank you so much for this comment,
      Im glad it was helpful in your journey of self discovery. The reality is that “friends with benefits” is not friends with benefits at all it is actually friends with “sexual involvement” when we adhere to the initial purpose of a friendship the real benefits come in the form of a person you can share with.

      We as growing people need to be strong enough to keep sex out of the equation as sex in the wrong contexts usually blurs the lines of trust in the person and their intentions. We usually get sucked into terrible moments of insecurity when we see our “friend” fall in love with someone else. Or is no longer as interested in us as they once were. Its most likely because we tampered with the purpose of our friendship without mutually deciding on commitment

      I sincerely hope as you sort of plough through the deeper thoughts you will get to experience some sort of freedom from the trap. If at all you wish to discuss this more feel free to send an email to

      mrvitouk@gmail.com

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